Too right you should be frustrated...

So, there I was tonight sitting in a relatively major traffic jam, listening to the Olympics and relaxing. I had nowhere to be so the easiest thing to do is just to chill out, isn't it? I have 20 minutes where I can be and will be nowhere else, so why stress?

That got me thinking.

I was watching the cars that seem to be really, really eager to get nowhere; pushing up behind the car in front. Filling gaps of a few metres with misplaced haste as if them filling the gap makes the queue move quicker. And I asked myself the question "why is it people get so frustrated when they have a perfect chance to do nothing yet do nothing when they have every chance to do something?".  It sounds complex but I don't think it is. I think it's really simple.

Pictures. It's all a matter of pictures.

When people sit in traffic jams, they have a clear picture of where they want to be playing inside their heads. The gap between sitting in the jam and that picture of where they should/want to be causes the frustration. Take the phrase 'I've got better places to be than sitting in this bloody traffic' as an example.

So why don't we do that in our lives? Why don't you try running a picture of a fitter, healthier, happier you inside your head and run it sooooo vividly that the fact you aren't there already causes you so much frustration you would do anything to be there now? Why is it that we use all our mind's incredible resources on traffic jams and so little on making ourselves who we want to be?

Run the picture now. Be frustrated at the fact you aren't there already. Promise yourself that yo are going to use that frustration as fuel to close the gap, to drive up the arse of the things you don't want until they get out of your bloody way and you can get to where you want to be instead.
Vroom, vroom, people! You've got better places to be than where you are :)

7 Rules of Life - 6. All power comes from within

7 Rules of Life - 6. All power comes from within


When I coach people I am always very aware of one change, that any change that occurs for that person is 100% down to them.  I have merely been a witness and a guide to help them find the places they already possessed to empower them to make the change.

That might sound a bit bizarre to anyone that puts their faith in a specific guru or expert or attributes change to some magic touch they received but I promise you that you made the change yourself.

I am privileged and honoured to be the guide for so many people and many people who I have helped through courses and privately have expressed their gratitude for any help I have given them.  I thank you if you are one of them however I didn't make the change, YOU DID!

You see, everything you have ever done and accomplished is because of you.  You probably don't even realise just how much you are capable of but, and I promise this is true, if you just went for your dreams with 100% conviction and refused, point blank refused, to stop until you got everything you wanted, guess what? You'd have everything you wanted!

But so few of us do that.  We give away our power, becoming martyrs and victims of our own crappy circumstances.  We believe we have no power and we end up stagnant or potentially we even end up going backwards, running from life like it is some scary zombie that refuses to be baseball batted into submission (scary, life zombies...now there's a metaphor!).

We have unlimited power when we choose to use it.  There have been times in your life when you have went deep and managed to find that extra ounce of energy, that little push when you needed it most, that moment of clarity amidst chaos.  This is your power.  You own it.

If you just chose to really use your incredible power, just what amazing things would you be capable of?

Or is it easier to sit on your ass, do piss all and pretend you don't have any?

Your move...

7 Rules of Life - 1. The World is what you think it is

7 Rules of Life - 1. The World is what you think it is

Every minute of every day we filter the world through everything we have ever learned and experienced.  Every single second you have been alive has contributed to the way you experience your life today.

For example, if you grew up in a world of red, blue would seem amazing while orange may appear not quite right.  I know it's a crazy example but I hope it makes sense!  

At no point in your life will you ever interact with the 'real' world.  Everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, you experience is filtered by you.  Here's a mind blower, you are that unique that not one person ever in history has experienced this moment before and no one will ever experience it ever again.  This moment, right now is unique.  What have you done with it?!

Your expectations of life, the world and everything are defined by your internal experience.  If you think work is going to be hell, it probably will be. If you think your boss is an ass, it doesn't matter what they do you will see them as an ass. If you believe you are not good enough you will find your evidence to support that and you'll get to be right, congratulations!

Your thoughts are powerful.  How would your world change if you believed you are capable of anything?  How would you change you if you trusted that the opportunity to live your dream will present itself? 

The world is exactly what you think it is because your thoughts are your world.  The second you realise that is the second you take power over your life.

Aloha

The dusty corners of your head

I was digging through some old files on the computer tonight getting ready to transfer onto my shiny new one and I found some amazing things that I'd forgotten.  Things I'd put some serious work into, filed away and then never looked back on as life and HeadStrong moved on.  If I must say so myself, some of it is really good!  And some of it has reminded me of many of the things that were important to me back then and perhaps should be important to me now (i'm going to post one of those things straight after this post).

This is what happens isn't it?  We work hard to make things like relationships, careers, lives, hobbies, businesses, families, health and then before we know it we forget the hard work we put in and take it for granted.  Just another file in the big disc drive of life.

If you look back tonight, what have you done that you are proud of?  The answer 'nothing' is banned due to the fact it's total bollocks, there will be at least one thing if you are really honest with yourself.

We put work into these things because they matter and because they are important to us. So keep them, cherish them, repurpose them and realise that much of what was important to you then, if your honest, is still important now.

Be proud of your old files.  They made you who you are today and many of them can help you become the person you want to be tomorrow.

The 'old you' is gone. Long live the 'new you'!

So today my kids embarked on new adventures. Jodie, my oldest at 13, went on her first substantial school trip on a 24hr round trip to a theme park in England and at this very moment Amy, 11, has attended her school dance to celebrate the move to high school and is now being driven around Glasgow in a pink limousine! It's been quite a day for both of them I'm sure. I'm now sitting here waiting to hear all the amazing details.

Everything evolves and moves. Nothing stands still. It can sometimes seem like time is static but it's not. We get older (in fact, it is a fact that you are older now than you were when you started reading this!) and time moves forward without ever looking back.

So why don't we? Why do we try and hold onto the past, wanting all things to just stay the same? We waste time wanting to be the 'old me' again and never fully embracing the chance to be someone new. We mourn the loss of our children's innocence when we should be celebrating their independence. We look in the mirror and curse the signs of our ageing rather than wallowing in our experience and learning.

My kids are growing and evolving every day, as am I. Our culture has developed a fear of a fundamental law of nature, time. It's the equivalent of starting a campaign to complain about the colour of the sky. Its pointless. There is nothing you can do.

Time moves forward. Never back. Do you?